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Six mistakes to avoid on a first date

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Meeting your love interest for the first time can be exciting and nerve-wracking. First dates often come with a rush of emotions and frequent questions about what to wear, what to say, and how to act.

Despite the uncertainties and anxiety that accompany first dates, it is important to make a good impression and ensure a smooth experience to avoid sabotaging the chance of a meaningful relationship.

Given this, here are mistakes you should steer clear of to ensure a smooth and enjoyable date experience.

  • Being late

Showing up late to a date can create a bad first impression. It can even give off the impression that you do not value or respect your date and his/her time.

To avoid being late, plan your journey and aim to arrive a few minutes early to demonstrate punctuality and consideration.

In case of unexpected delays, communicate with your date. Let him/her know why you will be running late and do not forget to apologise.

  • Dressing inappropriately

You should dress the way you want to be addressed by your date.

Do you know your appearance can speak volumes about your personality, confidence, style, and preferences? So dress and appear in a way that will give a long-lasting positive impression.

Dress appropriately and comfortably without going overboard or overdressing for the event.

  • Constantly checking your phone

Why are you at the date in the first place when you know you will be on your phone throughout?

It is important to put your phone away during a date so you won’t make your date feel unimportant and ignored.

So put away your phone, pay attention, listen, and engage in conversation. Make yourself fully present and interested during conversations.

The only reason you should be on your phone constantly is when you are expecting an important call or message. And your date must have been aware of this beforehand.

  • Talking too much

Yes, you should be active in the conversation but moderation is key. Do not overdo it.

Some people tend to talk more when nervous which is understandable. However, remember that a date is a conversation, and it should be balanced: your date talks, and you talk.

Try not to dominate the conservation. Talking too much about yourself is a major turn-off on a first date.

The essence of a date is for both people to get to know each other so practice active listening.

Ask open-ended questions to encourage your date to share about themselves and aim for a balanced conversation.

Also, avoid bringing up politics or religious subjects. These subjects can be controversial and create tension or disagreement.

  • Talking about your ex

Understandably, you want something serious and you want to do a little preliminary digging.

There is no harm in asking but let it come up organically. Also, do not dwell on it for too long.

Give your date time to open up about his/her past relationship. Do not force it, not even on the first date.

Try not to also bring in your past relationships except when you are asked. This can make your date uncomfortable and give the impression that you are not over your exes.

Rather, keep the conversation light and focused on getting to know each other.

Save more personal topics for later dates when a deeper connection has been established.

  • Trying to get physically intimate too soon

Pushing for physical intimacy too early can create discomfort and send the wrong message.

First dates are meant to establish a connection and understand compatibility, not to rush into physical relations.

So, respect personal boundaries and focus on building emotional and intellectual connections first.

If the relationship works out, there is plenty of time to explore physical intimacy.

But on a first date, do not try to establish physical intimacy to avoid coming off as creepy or desperate.

Remember, be yourself throughout the conversation and let the relationship develop naturally. Don’t force it.

Relationships

5 thoughtful gifts to get your partner for Christmas

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You know how we do in Naija when Christmas is just around the corner. This is the season of jollof rice, family vibes, and, of course, amazing gifts.

Now let’s be real when it comes to gifts. People are tired of boring and occasional gifts like Ankara fabrics, bland gift cards, and hampers, as these things fade away as soon as they are consumed. So this year let’s talk about five thoughtful gifts that’ll blow your partner’s mind and make this Christmas one for the books. These aren’t just gifts; they’re pure vibes.

Here are 5 thoughtful gifts to get your partner for Christmas.

1. Personalised jewellery

First up, we’ve got personalised jewellery. Trust me, this one hits every single time. Personalised gifts like this show your partner that you’ve put thought and effort into it.

Think about a necklace with their name, a bracelet engraved with your anniversary date, or a cute ring with a special message like “My Babe Forever.” Whether they wear it to Sunday service or flex it at a wedding, personalised jewellery is not just a gift; it’s a memory they carry with them.

There are plenty of Naija jewellers who can customise something stunning for you. Add a nice box and a handwritten note, and you’ve got yourself a top-tier gift that screams, “I care about you.”

2. Experience gifts

Sometimes, we just need a break from the daily hustle and city heat and traffic, and that’s why experience gifts are such a vibe.

It could be a weekend staycation in a luxury hotel, tickets to a Burna Boy or Asake concert, or even a relaxing spa date to help them recover from the December rush. For the adventurous ones, how about paragliding in Jos or hiking in Obudu?

It’s not just the experience itself; it’s the memories you create together. And trust me, you’ll be in their good books for a long, long time.

3. Custom photo book

Now this one is pure romance that brings back all the beautiful memories. Imagine creating a custom photo book filled with all the memories you and your partner have shared. From the cute selfies you took during your first date to the epic road trips or even those funny moments during wedding prep.

You can add captions like, “This was when we got stuck in Ajah traffic for five hours!” or “Our first beach date in Tarkwa Bay.” It’s more than just a gift; it’s your relationship in a book.

And the best part is that the memories are sweet, sentimental, and priceless. You can sit down together, flip through the pages, and laugh over all the memories.

4. Subscription boxes

Another perfect gift for your partner this Christmas season is a subscription box. Imagine your partner receiving a surprise package every month. It’s like Christmas 12 times a year.

From gourmet Nigerian snacks (think plantain chips, chin chin, and cashew nuts) to skincare products or even fitness gear, there’s a subscription box for everyone.

5. Handwritten love letters

In this digital age of WhatsApp messages and emojis, handwritten love letters are seriously underrated. Remind them why you fell in love, recount your favourite memories, and share your dreams for the future. You could even hide these letters in unexpected places—tuck one in their handbag or slide another under their pillow.

The beauty of a handwritten letter is that it lasts forever, even long after Christmas; your partner can pull it out, read it, and feel all warm and fuzzy. You can also add some local touches, like using Ankara stationery or a traditional wax-sealed envelope, and another gift, such as a photo album or a piece of jewellery.

Selecting a thoughtful gift for your partner this Christmas does not have to be difficult. These suggestions, ranging from personalised jewellery to handwritten love letters, emphasise the significance of effort and sentiment in gift-giving. The best gifts reflect your particular connection, making this season not just joyous but unforgettable.

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Relationships

Tiwa Savage opens up about her divorce from TeeBillz

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Tiwa Savage, the Nigerian singer, has opened up about her divorce from Tunji ‘TeeBillz‘ Balogun, her ex-husband.

The duo divorced in 2018 after efforts to resolve the differences in their marriage proved abortive.

In an interview with The Receipts Podcast, the ‘Kele Kele’ hitmaker revealed that her ex-husband was responsible for the divorce.

The award-winning songstress said at the time, she was struggling with postpartum depression after giving birth to their son.

The 44-year-old singer said she faced intense criticism from the public, with many attacking her without giving her a chance to share her side of the story.

She also recalled how some prominent figures advised her to remain silent about the incident to protect her reputation.

“When I came out, I was Nigeria’s sweetheart when I started and I could do no wrong in Nigerian’s eyes. I did everything by the book. I went to university and I wasn’t a baby mama. I got married then I had a baby so I did everything in the right order and everybody loved me and then everything happened,” she said.

“Then I started getting hate from blogs and I started getting hate from certain people. The way our situation happened, he announced it online. I didn’t break up with him but I was the one being attacked.

“At the time, my baby was just a few months old and I was dealing with postpartum and my body wasn’t the same and I was depressed. Everyone then went to him and only a few people came to see me.

“After I interviewed to tell my side of the story, it got worse. People were like ‘How dare you go and talk’ ‘You’re a woman and you’re supposed to build the house, it’s your fault’.

“I remember famous people calling me to ask how I could tell my side of the story cuz I’d never win. Ever since then, I was like I won’t ever talk about the situation because it was very heartbreaking how the public took it and blamed me.”

She added that the experience was an “eye-opener” that made her become “wild and carefree”.

“It was an eye-opener for me and it made me depressed for so long. It got me angry then I became the ‘African Bad Girl’,” she added.

“I thought to myself that after doing everything right I was still attacked. Then I started getting tattoos and wearing short skirts and bikini. I was just wild.”

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Relationships

Actress Etinosa Idemudia remarries in Lagos

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Etinosa Idemudia, the Nigerian actress, has tied the knot again, this time with a white man.

Etinosa took to her Instagram page to share a video of herself and her lover, whose name and nationality are yet to be revealed.

In the accompanying caption, the actress wrote, “I don carry my two left enter new relationship. Please wish me well ❤️ 💍”.

In another Instagram post on Thursday, Etinosa shared a photo from their legal wedding ceremony held at the Ikoyi Registry in Lagos.

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