Saying the words “I do” could be very frightening for some women before or when their guy pops the question.

While some look forward to the day when they get to say those words and daydream about walking down the aisle beside Mr Right, some dread the very idea of forming a perpetual union.

The reasons, why women are scared of getting married, vary from person to person.

Below are five of them.

Emotional and financial insecurity

These can be argued as two major reasons any woman would dread the idea of marriage. The tendency for the blazing fire of love between them and their partners to dwindle over time scares women a lot.

The questions – Will he love me still when I get bloated from the rigours of childbirth? What if some days we run out of things to say and the conversation dries up? What happens if he becomes financially unstable? – and much more worry many a woman.

Fear of commitment

Till death do us part! The thought of having to succumb to the authority of a man, dedication to a long-term cause, giving birth and raising children, keeping up with relatives and in-laws, taking care of the home, the opportunities forgone to stick to one person; and combining all of these with work, makes marriage seem scary to some women.

Career pursuit

Some women are literally married to their jobs – so what’s the need for a man.

They dedicate more of their time to their profession and climbing the ladder of success, often neglecting their emotional needs and those of their partners.

For them, marriage will create a lacuna between them and work. Thus, they would rather remain single.

Fear of the unknown

Unarguably, the future is plagued with many uncertainties, and nature or perhaps fate has forced the human to hope for the best but prepare for the worst.

The fear of what the future holds is a withdrawing force for women.

Risk of divorce

Some women, because of their not-too-good experience in broken homes or the stigma attached to being a divorcee, would rather remain single than get married and risk breaking up.

In relationships, it’s easy for a woman to get caught up in the excitement and emotion of loving a man. We often find ourselves willing to make sacrifices and compromises for the sake of love and commitment.

However, it’s essential to maintain your personal boundaries and protect your self-worth, especially when marriage is not yet on the horizon.

As a woman, taking certain actions too soon can undermine your worth and leave you with regret if the relationship doesn’t progress as expected. It’s crucial to prioritize your own needs, goals, and aspirations while navigating a relationship.

Without further ado, here are things you should avoid doing for a man who hasn’t put a ring on it:

• Changing your identity

Avoid making drastic physical or personal changes just to please or prove love to a man.

The decision to alter your core identity like religion, personal values, appearance should be personal, not external pressure. Doing it for a man can lead to resentment especially if the relationship fails.

Authenticity is crucial to building a healthy relationship. A man who loves you will accept you just as you are.

• Cutting off loved ones

A man who discourages you from maintaining a relationship with your family and friends is a walking red flag, simple and short.

So never allow any man persuade you to cut ties with them because they are your support system that will be needed for your emotional well-being.

A healthy relationship does not isolate you; instead, it enhances your life by helping you build impactful relationships.

Keep those relationships intact, you will need their love, support and guidance through life’s challenges.

• Sacrificing your career, ambition or passion

Never put your dreams on hold for anyone, including a man who hasn’t committed to building a future with you. A supportive partner will cheer you on not discourage you.

• Tolerating disrespect or abuse

Never compromise on your self-worth and self respect regardless of your love for him.

Maltreatment, abuse of any kind and disrespect should not be excused in a relationship and never think marriage will change these behaviours.

Prioritise your physical, mental and emotional well-being.

• Living with him as a ‘wife’

Avoid playing the role of a wife by cooking, cleaning and managing the affairs of his house if he is not committed.

Cohabitating might seem like a good idea but it often make it difficult to set boundaries.

Also, you have no business taking up the responsibilities of a wife at his parents’ house or for his friends.

Setting boundaries is not about being rude, it’s about maintaining your self-respect and ensuring you are not taken for granted.

• Taking loans for him

Protect your finances by steering clear of actions like borrowing money on his behalf.

In a relationship without long-term commitment, taking on debt for him could leave you shouldering the financial burden alone if things go wrong.

Let him handle his own financial responsibilities while offering other forms of emotional or moral support.

Your finances are personal — guard them wisely.

• Having children for him

Never think of “tying down a man” with pregnancy, it is a very risky decision to take.

Giving birth is a huge responsibility that should not be shouldered by just one person. So without marriage, you risk being left to raise a child alone if the relationship falters.

Ensure you both agree on your future before taking this life-changing step.

Love is a beautiful journey, but make sure to guard your heart, finances, and future while at it.

Also, ensure the commitment, efforts, respects and sacrifices are mutual.

Comedian and actor Adebowale Adedayo, widely known as Mr. Macaroni, has opened up about the challenges of maintaining faithfulness in marriages and relationships, describing it as a task that is “possible but difficult”.

Speaking during an appearance on the Diary of a Naija Girl podcast, the popular skit maker touched on the intricacies of staying committed, noting that while it may be easy to offer advice on relationships, adhering to those principles in personal life can be more challenging.

Mr. Macaroni stressed that infidelity is a universal issue that affects both men and women.

He stressed that once an individual embarks on the path of unfaithfulness, it can become increasingly difficult to turn back.

He said, “It’s possible not to cheat, but it is very difficult. I might not be in a relationship or considering it right now, but I’m a relationship expert. I’m serious. I’m an expert because my friends talk to me about their relationships, and I advise them. But I think it’s easy to help them because I’m outside the relationship.

“So, it’s very difficult not to cheat as a married person. Both male and female, not just the man… You tell yourself that you will cheat only once, but once you start, there’s no going back.”