Relationships
Six signs you are in a bad relationship — and when to call it quits
Most relationship red flags pop up right from the beginning. Deniability in relationships is most times the prevailing factor of untimely and ugly breakups.
Problems in relationships have less to do with actual behavior and more to do with the feelings and intentions behind them.
While some relationships are a no-no from the start, some of us don’t even recognize unhealthy relationships when we eventually get involved.
Here are five reasons it may be time to cue and call it quit.
Decline in intimacy
The honeymoon periods are always the best. Intimate connections are established between the couple during these moments. When the honeymoon period ends, whether or not it was abrupt, and there isn’t any effort for resuscitation, the relationship is taking a decline.
That’s a red flag. It could be a passionless intercourse, consistent rejection in the bedroom, amongst others. It gets worse when you realize your mind wanders as much as you think your significant other’s does as well.
Your relationship is lacking fun
Your one time fun relationship has now turned to a battlefield with his words and actions as his strike and your paranoia and drama as yours. When you notice this has begun to happen, that is a red flag waving at you willingly. Being around you significant other is supposed to be your one-stop solace from the rest of the world. Especially as reality happens daily and you’d require close comfort in order to de-stress and unwind.
Living in the past
Most relationships are suffering the calamity of previous bad relationships. It is often said that what you resist, persist. Focusing on the wrongdoings and mistakes from your past will only make you feel negative and full of criticism about your current relationship.
Let go and leave those relationships where they belong – fixating on prior pain will only cause more to appear and leave no room to actually enjoy the connection in the new relationship.
Technology love
Being on the phone more than usual since the relationship can be a sign of rejection. Of course not entirely as sometimes, it could actually be work calling but it cannot also be completely ruled out as a potential red flag.
Every other relationship takes priority
Prioritizing time spent together is key in every relationship, for it could either make or break the bond between the couple. They should both be willing to spend time with each other regardless of the tugs coming from personal lives. It should also be mutual and not one-sided. Most times in every relationship, both partners need time apart, but if your partner is constantly choosing to hang with friends and coworkers instead of you, that is an issue.
Your partner keeps you at arm’s length
When most attributes that built and solidified the connection between a couple become estranged, every other thing falls apart- including the relationship. Things like cuddling, emotional support, and whatnot become reduced or nonexistent. At this point, there is no reason being together if you are slowly becoming strangers to yourselves.
Relationships
5 thoughtful gifts to get your partner for Christmas
You know how we do in Naija when Christmas is just around the corner. This is the season of jollof rice, family vibes, and, of course, amazing gifts.
Now let’s be real when it comes to gifts. People are tired of boring and occasional gifts like Ankara fabrics, bland gift cards, and hampers, as these things fade away as soon as they are consumed. So this year let’s talk about five thoughtful gifts that’ll blow your partner’s mind and make this Christmas one for the books. These aren’t just gifts; they’re pure vibes.
Here are 5 thoughtful gifts to get your partner for Christmas.
1. Personalised jewellery
First up, we’ve got personalised jewellery. Trust me, this one hits every single time. Personalised gifts like this show your partner that you’ve put thought and effort into it.
Think about a necklace with their name, a bracelet engraved with your anniversary date, or a cute ring with a special message like “My Babe Forever.” Whether they wear it to Sunday service or flex it at a wedding, personalised jewellery is not just a gift; it’s a memory they carry with them.
There are plenty of Naija jewellers who can customise something stunning for you. Add a nice box and a handwritten note, and you’ve got yourself a top-tier gift that screams, “I care about you.”
2. Experience gifts
Sometimes, we just need a break from the daily hustle and city heat and traffic, and that’s why experience gifts are such a vibe.
It could be a weekend staycation in a luxury hotel, tickets to a Burna Boy or Asake concert, or even a relaxing spa date to help them recover from the December rush. For the adventurous ones, how about paragliding in Jos or hiking in Obudu?
It’s not just the experience itself; it’s the memories you create together. And trust me, you’ll be in their good books for a long, long time.
3. Custom photo book
Now this one is pure romance that brings back all the beautiful memories. Imagine creating a custom photo book filled with all the memories you and your partner have shared. From the cute selfies you took during your first date to the epic road trips or even those funny moments during wedding prep.
You can add captions like, “This was when we got stuck in Ajah traffic for five hours!” or “Our first beach date in Tarkwa Bay.” It’s more than just a gift; it’s your relationship in a book.
And the best part is that the memories are sweet, sentimental, and priceless. You can sit down together, flip through the pages, and laugh over all the memories.
4. Subscription boxes
Another perfect gift for your partner this Christmas season is a subscription box. Imagine your partner receiving a surprise package every month. It’s like Christmas 12 times a year.
From gourmet Nigerian snacks (think plantain chips, chin chin, and cashew nuts) to skincare products or even fitness gear, there’s a subscription box for everyone.
5. Handwritten love letters
In this digital age of WhatsApp messages and emojis, handwritten love letters are seriously underrated. Remind them why you fell in love, recount your favourite memories, and share your dreams for the future. You could even hide these letters in unexpected places—tuck one in their handbag or slide another under their pillow.
The beauty of a handwritten letter is that it lasts forever, even long after Christmas; your partner can pull it out, read it, and feel all warm and fuzzy. You can also add some local touches, like using Ankara stationery or a traditional wax-sealed envelope, and another gift, such as a photo album or a piece of jewellery.
Selecting a thoughtful gift for your partner this Christmas does not have to be difficult. These suggestions, ranging from personalised jewellery to handwritten love letters, emphasise the significance of effort and sentiment in gift-giving. The best gifts reflect your particular connection, making this season not just joyous but unforgettable.
Relationships
Tiwa Savage opens up about her divorce from TeeBillz
Tiwa Savage, the Nigerian singer, has opened up about her divorce from Tunji ‘TeeBillz‘ Balogun, her ex-husband.
The duo divorced in 2018 after efforts to resolve the differences in their marriage proved abortive.
In an interview with The Receipts Podcast, the ‘Kele Kele’ hitmaker revealed that her ex-husband was responsible for the divorce.
The award-winning songstress said at the time, she was struggling with postpartum depression after giving birth to their son.
The 44-year-old singer said she faced intense criticism from the public, with many attacking her without giving her a chance to share her side of the story.
She also recalled how some prominent figures advised her to remain silent about the incident to protect her reputation.
“When I came out, I was Nigeria’s sweetheart when I started and I could do no wrong in Nigerian’s eyes. I did everything by the book. I went to university and I wasn’t a baby mama. I got married then I had a baby so I did everything in the right order and everybody loved me and then everything happened,” she said.
“Then I started getting hate from blogs and I started getting hate from certain people. The way our situation happened, he announced it online. I didn’t break up with him but I was the one being attacked.
“At the time, my baby was just a few months old and I was dealing with postpartum and my body wasn’t the same and I was depressed. Everyone then went to him and only a few people came to see me.
“After I interviewed to tell my side of the story, it got worse. People were like ‘How dare you go and talk’ ‘You’re a woman and you’re supposed to build the house, it’s your fault’.
“I remember famous people calling me to ask how I could tell my side of the story cuz I’d never win. Ever since then, I was like I won’t ever talk about the situation because it was very heartbreaking how the public took it and blamed me.”
She added that the experience was an “eye-opener” that made her become “wild and carefree”.
“It was an eye-opener for me and it made me depressed for so long. It got me angry then I became the ‘African Bad Girl’,” she added.
“I thought to myself that after doing everything right I was still attacked. Then I started getting tattoos and wearing short skirts and bikini. I was just wild.”
Relationships
Actress Etinosa Idemudia remarries in Lagos
Etinosa Idemudia, the Nigerian actress, has tied the knot again, this time with a white man.
Etinosa took to her Instagram page to share a video of herself and her lover, whose name and nationality are yet to be revealed.
In the accompanying caption, the actress wrote, “I don carry my two left enter new relationship. Please wish me well ❤️ 💍”.
In another Instagram post on Thursday, Etinosa shared a photo from their legal wedding ceremony held at the Ikoyi Registry in Lagos.
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